My precious daughter, I’m writing this at night as you sleep, so tiny and new. I waited until I knew you were fast asleep. Your daddy is resting upstairs at my insistence, but know he’s taken many late-night shifts with joy. Tonight, it’s you and I until sun up. I have an ear listening for you to stir, and I’m looking forward to your next feed so I can rock you and put you back to sleep, so safe and loved.

I wanted to record this before the details became foggy with time. You should know your birth was wonderful, and a lot of people helped you arrive, and we were so in love from the moment you arrived.

We had a date set to meet you on May 28th. But you didn’t wait that long to meet us!

They say a lot of mothers have a nesting instinct just before having their baby, and while your dad joked that I’ve been nesting at our house since we got married, one the morning of May 19th was particularly memorable. I woke up with an overwhelming urge to get our house in order. Even though I had been very tired in my 9th month, and even though I didn’t have an easy time getting around, I suddenly needed things to be just right.

I knew I needed to deep clean the pantry and refrigerator, and I couldn’t be stopped. For weeks, I’d been nervously saying I needed more time before you arrived. But that afternoon, I jokingly told my family and friends that now those two chores were done, I felt you could be born.

After such a change in feelings, I shouldn’t have been surprised by the events of that night, but I sure was. I laid down to sleep late that night, and your daddy helped me get EXTRA comfortable with some creative pillows. I thought, “I haven’t been this comfortable in months. Maybe I’ll finally get some sleep.”

Suddenly, I felt a POP, and then a warm, big gush. I exclaimed I thought my water was breaking, then told your dad I KNEW it was breaking. I didn’t realize this isn’t very common, but it was truly like a movie. Just a big, warm RUSH. He rushed over with a couple of towels, and before I knew it, we were both nervously grinning. We realized we would get to meet you MUCH sooner than we had planned, and we were so excited.

We had our bags packed and ready to go, and I took the time to take a nice relaxing shower that felt so warm refreshing. Then, we packed up the truck, and we drove to our local hospital in disbelief that we’d get to meet you soon.

When we arrived, we realized we had no idea where to go for a middle-of-the-night delivery. We wandered around looking for the right place, and a kind security guard recognized we looked quite lost, called up to Labor and Delivery, and helped us find our way.

It was the perfect introduction to the hospital staff, because nearly everyone we met was lovely. Two wonderful nurses helped us get settled in, verified my water had indeed broken, and we got settled into our own special room.

I got to labor in a room with just Daddy and I for quite a few hours. We got a little help to get things moving along. Your dad held my hand, helped me breathe, and told me I was strong and that he was proud of me. I was not afraid because he was there with me. After a little while, just as it got mor uncomfortable, our wonderful doula arrived and she helped me relax through contractions, try some different tools, held my hand, rubbed my back, and helped your dad help me even more.

We were a team, the three of us, together with hospital nurses and doctors. Our own doctor came in so much to check on both of us and make sure we were ok. It’s so special that he had two patients, you and I both, and he kept a watchful eye over both of us for so long.

We tried a lot of things to keep things moving along, but after almost 24 hours, we knew it would be safest for both you and I if we had a c-section. I don’t know how old you’ll be when you read this story, but I want you to know I was not afraid.

Our doctor told me all the laboring I’d done still counted, but this was the safest for you and me. Your sweet heart was dropping quite a bit with every contraction, much more often and to a greater degree than they like to see, and you weren’t getting closer to being born just yet. We also knew that after my water breaking, the longer we went on without you being born, the more risk we had for infection.

Instead of feeling disappointed, I felt so excited to get to meet you soon. I was also grateful knowing the option we were choosing would keep you the safest.

As soon as the doctor left, a whole team of nurses and an anesthetist got us ready to go, and they wheeled me into a bright operating room. They sent us off to a surgical team with congratulations and excitement. Your daddy came in soon afterward to hold my hand, we made jokes and held hands.

The procedure was very fast, and we immediately heard your sweet cry from the other side of a curtain. Daddy and I were stunned that you were here and real.

You were a wonderful, healthy baby girl at 6 lbs 14 oz, 19 inches long, born late at night on May 20th. A head full of hair, a strong, squawky cry, and such a beautiful face. Everyone who saw you told us how beautiful you were. When we got to see you for a moment, we cried tears of joy!

Soon after we left the Operating Room, in recovery, they laid you on my chest. I couldn’t believe I had a precious daughter to love. Even though the next few hours from post op to our recovery room are a little bit of a blurry memory to me, I know I will never forget your tiny body against mine, warm and wonderful, a new life to love and cherish. Suddenly this dream I had and this sweet girl I felt kick and flip in my tummy for so long was in the world! I got to meet the child I’d dreamed of, hear your sweet sounds, and hold you to my chest.

The next day and a half in the hospital was packed with lots of check ups, check-ins, and delighted visitors. Your Nana, Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle Alex, and Aunt Jenna ALL came to meet you and loved you so much. I learned to feed you, Daddy changed so many diapers and made sure we both had everything we needed.

Early the next morning, the night nurse who was on her way home stopped by to say goodbye, as I stood over your bassinet. She asked if she could pray for us, and I said yes with eager delight. Sweet one, she prayed over you, your future, your health, and our hope that you know how much Jesus loves you. Your tired Mama wept with joy that you’d received that blessing.

We were discharged to go home on Wednesday the 22nd, and it was perfect timing. You brother Everett was coming home from his mom’s house AND his last day of school! Charlotte, he beamed when he met you. And you should know he has loved you every minute since.

Before I sneak in to check on you once more in your crib, I want you to know that your birth and arrival was not without challenges, but was a joyful, supportive, loving experience. We are all so glad you’re here, my baby bird. We thank Jesus for you every day.